More thoughts…

The following is a bit raw.  I mean, it’s more a stream of consciousness than anything else.  I would appreciate comments from other adoptees at this point.  Even those who have gone through the reunion process.

As you can imagine I’m still trying to process this week’s events.  It’s still a bit surreal for me-this whole birth mother thing…It’s not that I haven’t thought about it, because I have endlessly.  Now it’s more real, and I guess I’m starting to get a little bit nervous.  This doesn’t decrease the level of excitement I still have, but now I’m thinking about all these other issues and questions I’ll have and how to ask her in a sensitive way.

How to talk about my birth father-A man, for me  who has been absent in my story as far as I can tell, but someone who I still want to know about.  But of course this will be a hard question to ask.  Add to that the possibility that I might be meeting my two half-siblings and step father and it makes things even harder.  But I will have to ask.

What is my story?  What is her story?  Is it just as the agency told us it happened?  So much territory to cover in a short period of time.

I also have to solve the whole translator question.  I’ll need a translator for sure.  I’m not sure if Holt provides them, but I think that GOAL does as well.  Does anyone have any experience with using translators in Korea?  Thanks for all the support I have received!  I really appreciate it. -GS

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3 Comments on “More thoughts…

  1. Hi, I am excited and nervous along with you, this is a big life-altering time in your life. I have had great experiences with GOA’L regarding translators. Do you know Dae-won or Nichole at GOA’L? If not, let me know if I can help connect you with folks in Korea. I have a lot of KAD friends currently living there.

  2. I feel for you. In birth searches and reunions there are countless versions of the “truth.” The stories are always changing.

    I’d recommend avoiding relying on adoption agency staff as translators if possible. Since they are agency employees, they generally tend to treat translating as they often tend to treat our adoption records — guarding the facts in the name of “protecting” the birth parent(s) as well as “protecting” us from anything they don’t think we should know. Thus, the straight translation is often “softened” or distorted. In my experience, I felt very shortchanged by the translation provided by the translator (an agency social worker) at my first reunion meeting. I also accompanied a good friend to her first reunion meeting (facilitated by her agency), and the same thing happened there. At any rate, you might want to record what is said so that you can have your own copy of what was really said, because I don’t know about you, but I was so dazed and in shock that I couldn’t remember much of anything afterward.

    Best of luck, as always, and sending all my support!

  3. You have always been able to speak about difficult subjects in a thoughtful and sensitive way. I know you will do fine.

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